


Absurd

by angellwings



Category: The West Wing
Genre: Banter, F/M, Friendship, Season 3
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-29
Updated: 2014-09-29
Packaged: 2018-02-19 06:42:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 746
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2378630
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angellwings/pseuds/angellwings
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Set during the first two episodes of season 3. Donna and Josh have an absurd conversation as the result of boredom.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Absurd

**Author's Note:**

> Set during the first two episodes of season three. More Donna/Josh banter. Because I can't help myself.

"Did I or did I not ask you if you wanted food?" Josh asked as he snatched his take out container away from Donna.

"You did."

"And you said?"

"I said, thank you, I'd love som—"

"Donatella Moss."

"Oh shut up and share your French fries, you egomaniac," Donna said as she took the container back and placed it on the table between them. "You can afford more French fries."

"I shouldn't have to afford more, Donna," Josh said with a huff. " _You_ should buy your own."

"Do princesses buy their own jewels, Joshua?"

He paused and then turned to stare at her for a long moment. "Donna, anyone ever tell you that you're delusional?"

"All the time, baby," Donna said with a wink before she popped a French fry into her mouth.

"Wouldn't it just be simpler to buy your own fries?" Josh asked in a tired tone.

"Never," Donna told him. "Why would it be simpler to spend _my own_ money? It's much simpler for my bank account if I spend a bit of yours."

"A _bit_? You ate half of them!" Josh exclaimed. "My container is half empty!"

"No, your container is half full," Donna said with a smirk.

"Try not to look so smug," Josh said as he slid the rest of the fries toward her. "It bothers me."

"Okay, _Toby_ ," she said with a teasing chuckle as she picked up another fry. She glanced around the empty kitchen in the large country home and furrowed her brow. "Why are we out here again?"

"Campaign announcement," Josh said with a huff.

"Didn't we announce the campaign two weeks ago?" Donna asked.

"We did."

"And?"

"That's not enough for Bruno, Doug, and Connie apparently," Josh said irritably.

"I saw a snake outside by the back door," Donna told him.

"Yeah, CJ and I saw one in the barn earlier."

"It was huge." Donna said worriedly.

Josh shrugged unconvincingly. "The President says it's just a Garter Snake."

"I've seen Garter Snakes, Josh. They're tiny," Donna told him. "This snake was not tiny."

"He was staring CJ down earlier. I think he thought she'd be pretty tasty."

"CJ would be tasty," Donna said with a grin.

"This conversation is absurd," Josh said after a moment's pause.

"Absurd is our specialty, _Toby_ ," Donna said with a roll of her eyes. "Who do you think would be tastier: CJ or Ginger?"

"CJ hands down," Josh said with a nod.

"What about between Toby and Sam?"

"Sam," Josh said thoughtfully. "He exercises more."

"Okay, then myself and…Joey?" She asked in a challenging tone.

He grinned at her and shook his head. "You're ridiculous."

"Come on, who would be tastier?" Donna asked in a teasing tone.

"I'm not going to answer that," Josh said with a smirk.

"Because you know it would be me, right?" Donna asked with a teasing wink. "Seriously, though, Josh. What happened with Joey?"

"Donna, nothing is going to happen with Joey," he told her with small smile.

"What?" She asked in outrage. "I thought you liked her?"

"I did—I mean I do, but I don't think it would be very professional of me, now that we're using her for our internal polls, to date her," Josh explained. "That's what happened with Joey. Now, can we drop it please? _For good?"_

"Sure, if you want to be known as a yellow bellied coward," Donna said with a cool gaze.

"Donna—"

"I'm just saying, only cowards hide their feelings the way you're doing now. Especially when those feelings regard a person as impressive as Joey," she told him honestly.

"Donna, drop it," he said with a blank expression and a dry tone.

"Alright, alright," Donna said with a sigh. "I'll leave it alone."

"I don't want to date, Joey, okay? Trust me on that," Josh told her as he caught and held her gaze. "I don't."

Donna smiled at him in amusement. "I believe you."

"Donna—"

"No, I really do. You don't have to keep saying my name like that."

"I always say your name like that," Josh told her with a smirk.

"Fine, you don't have to keep saying my name like that _tonight_ ," she said with a soft laugh. "Better?"

"Much," Josh said with a teasing smirk.

"This was fun."

"No," he said with a shake of his head. "This was absurd."

"It's what we're good at, Josh. Get used to it."

"I've been used to it for the last three years."


End file.
